Self-Belief is about how you act says Alan Newton
Self-belief is the most powerful tool in our armoury, and self-doubt is the most destructive, so why do so many of us lack the first and know the second all too well?
I can’t talk about self-belief without first addressing self-doubt. You see, we know self-doubt as an old friend, one from our childhood. Even with the best-intentioned parents, teachers, careers advisors, we are probably all too familiar with the sentence that began “You can’t…”
“You can’t be a doctor, it’s very difficult and expensive.”
“You can’t be an artist, there’s not enough money in it.”
“You can’t be a footballer/ ballet dancer/ [substitute for activity of your choice]. You need to have a more realistic goal.”
These seeds of “you can’t” are largely sown at a very early age, and they increasingly begin to manifest in our own minds as we grow up. Self-doubt is one of the major obstacles that prevents us from living the lives we want to live. We tend to judge ourselves and doubt ourselves much more than other people do. We all have that inner voice in our heads that informs us that we are not good enough to do the things that we dream of doing. Too many of us don’t think we’re good enough. We listen to that inner voice that tells us what we can’t do and what we are, and we manifest into that person, that can’t or won’t.
Each time we face our fear, we gain strength, courage, and confidence in the doing ~ Unknown
You Can, Should, and Will Believe
I have met many men and women from the profession in the last couple of years, and there have been a very small few who belittle their profession and perpetuate the old-school perceptions, yet they’re not actively engaged in the broader Assistant community. They don’t belong to an association or membership group, they don’t read the industry publications, or attend exhibitions and events, so it’s little wonder their opinions are out-dated. But, it doesn’t make it any less damaging. Self-belief, for some, can begin from being surrounded by like-minded individuals and getting involved in association events.
Don’t Underestimate Yourself
I have found one fact particularly striking whilst getting to know more of you, and that’s the extensive nature of skills that you have and can offer a business. Of course, as with any profession, there is a scale associated with experience and the different job roles you perform. However, no matter where you are on the ladder and no matter your ambition, self-belief will get you a long way.
To journey towards self-belief, you need to face up to and conquer self-doubt. It’s a continual process, so you need to commit to some new habits. They can be very useful habits to formulate for general well-being too.
- Appreciate your individuality – Stop comparing yourself to others. It may sound like a cliché, but we are all unique and have different skills and talents to bring. Diverse organisations are proven to be high performers.
- Quiet Time – I’ve written about this topic before, but finding just 10-minutes quiet time a day to reflect and calm your mind is extremely beneficial. It doesn’t have to be meditation, but I would highly recommend making this a daily habit. Consider downloading a guided meditation app and go somewhere and switch off for 10-minutes a day.
- Journal – Writing is a very powerful and cathartic process. Consider answering regular questions, such as why you don’t believe you deserve more? What is stopping you from acknowledging your success? Do you believe you can aim higher? What does success look like? What would happen if you fail?
- Question & Feel – It’s up to you whether you include this step, but it works well with meditation. Consider the previous questions and ponder each one without – if you can – allowing your mind to answer. Notice how your body feels, how it responds to the questions. Allow the questions to dissolve without answering. Slowly, over time, you will notice the thoughts and feelings that arise shift and change, because they are temporary. So, you can change your outlook.
Self-belief is about how you act. The habits of controlling thoughts and feelings allow us to conquer fears and self-doubt, which enables us to manifest into the person we want to be. Don’t expect overnight successes. I’m still working hard on many aspects of self-doubt, but it’s improving.